School Days

Dear Sawyer,

GuhGaw and JieJie started school last week and with all the excitement over their new backpacks and first-day-of-school photos, you were visibly feeling left out. When we came back home after dropping them off at school, you sat down on the staircase and looked so sad and abandoned. But fear not, today was your turn! It was your very first first day of school and you were the star with your new backpack and first-day-of-school photos:

Since you have watched your older siblings go off to school for the past three years, you were very excited to finally go to school, too. We visited your classroom and met your teachers last week and you were looking forward to starting nursery school. You were in the same classroom and had the same teachers for your Moms & Tots class and you have always been pretty laidback, so I wasn't too worried that you would be scared on your first day.

That is, until PoiPoi came over this morning! She kept telling you, "You're going to school today! By yourself! By yourself! Not with Mama! You're going by yourself!" She probably thought she was helping but she repeated the "by yourself" part so much that I think it freaked you out. When it was time to eat lunch before we left for school, you suddenly started crying and shouting, "I don't want to go to school! I don't want to go to school!" You even stomped your feet for emphasis (and you were also wearing JieJie's old Frozen slippers, which made your indignation pretty cute). You cried for almost 10 minutes and I was finally able to console you when I said I would sit on a bench outside the classroom and wait for you there. You stopped crying and asked quietly if I could go into the classroom with you and I said I couldn't but I would be waiting right outside.

Daddy took you to school, too, and while we were waiting outside on the steps, you were happy again but also shy and nervous. A classmate named Mila came over and asked you what your name is but you stared down at the sidewalk and then buried your face in my leg. When we went into the gym to wait for your teachers, other kids were running or jumping around but you held my hand and stood quietly next to me. When your teachers arrived, you got into line, gave me a halfhearted hug and kiss and walked solemnly toward the classroom. You didn't smile and you didn't look back for me. Other kids were crying and I worried that their tears might set you off.

When I came back to pick you up after class, the teacher called your name and you came out. When you saw me waiting for you, your signature big smile lit up your face and you ran toward me holding out a hand print project you had made and a bag of graham crackers your teachers had given you. "Look what I got!" you exclaimed. I asked you if you had liked school and you said matter-of-factly, "Yes." Yay! Your first day of school was a success! I am so proud of you, sweetie!

Love,
Mom